God made ME for this

I wrote a blog in April of 2010. It's my favorite of all my writings but too personal to share in its entirety with the broad, skeptical world wide network of people. 

But its my favorite because I can still remember God talking to me as I drove down a lonely highway.  That brief reassurance He gave me, still calms my soul.

Over four years ago,  I had a newborn and a one year old.  I was working a 40 hour a week job.  My husband was working as well.  I was overwhelmed in trying to do all things, and struggled with the concept of working a job that I had no passion for, when it took my time away from my kids, whom I had a ton of passion for.

I hadn't been given the scariest news of my life yet.  The cancer growing in my left breast had still been undetected. 

I had imagined a future with more children, predicting some would be biological and some adopted.  But I didn't have G's beautiful smile yet woven into my heart.

I also hadn't had a baby born into Heaven.  One that I never got to see smile.

But why what God spoke to me is still so reassuring, is because it is still True.

I was agonizing over my job.  Why I didn't enjoy it or have a passion for it.  I wasn't doing a job that I thought was "worthy" like a doctor, teacher, lawyer. 
But then He spoke to me.
He asked me what Mary was known for in the Bible.  I thought.  She wasn't told be an amazing baker, a seamstress, a leather maker.  Her story was simply told because she was the mother of Jesus.  She was famously and enduringly known as the woman God chose to be a mother to His son. 
A MOTHER.
God trusted her with His son. 
And He has entrusted me with A, P, G and our baby boy coming very soon through adoption. 
In 2010, I was comforted with knowing that I was worthy in God's eyes, being simply a mother.  I still am.

Since then, I've been a mother in about every way there is.  I am a step mother. I am a biological mother.  I am an adoptive mother.  I have been a foster mother.  I'm a mother to an angel in Heaven. 
I've been a working mother, and now I'm a stay at home mother.
God trusted me with these children.  I can only hope I'm making Him proud with how I raise them.
But I will never, ever feel unworthy because I don't have some hot shot job.   I may not be a celebrity or a doctor or a scientist curing terrible diseases. 
But I am doing something every single day that I have a passion for. 
Loving my children.  Teaching them something.  Cuddling with them. 
And they will always know that they come first.  They are my most important "career."
And God has approved.  :)